Athletes regularly
carry on an inner dialogue—this is called self-talk.
Your self-talk can be negative and self-destructive to
confidence or it can be positive and help you remain
confident in challenging situations. If you want to be
negative with yourself, you have plenty of opportunity
to do so in sports. However, I do not think you will
perform your best nor have much fun. The key point is
that you have control over what you say to yourself and
have to work on staying positive.
It is easy to forget
someone else’s criticism of you, but it’s not easy to
forget your own criticism of yourself. I ask the
athletes I work with to monitor what they say to
themselves. If you get negative with your own self-talk
and cut yourself down, you have to recognize this
behavior and make an effort to change. When you say to
yourself “I can’t win this fight,” “you are the worst”,
or “Don’t lose another match”, you are hurting your own
confidence. Negative thoughts lead to low
self-confidence and negative outcomes. You are the only
person who knows when you being negative and the only
one who can turn it around.
The first step is to
pay attention to what you say to yourself and notice
when you begin to have negative thoughts. The goal is to
quickly identifying your negative self-talk. After you
finish a match, go back and think about when you were
negative with yourself. Write down the negative
statements and in what situations they occurred. If you
have more negative than positive self-talk during a
match, this indicates that you need to work on changing
your self-talk.
The next step is to
modify your typical negative thoughts or doubt. Write
down the negative self-statements from the previous
exercise. Next to each self-statement, change the
negative thought to a positive statement. For example,
the negative self-statement: "I can’t believe he fooled
you on that move, you are the worst fighter in the
world" change to "You are human and will make mistakes,
next time you will know better". Practice changing your
negative thoughts to positive thoughts on paper.
The final step is to
apply what you have done on paper to your matches. The
next time you become aware of a negative thought or
doubt, you will have a positive response ready to put
into place and apply. Make the choice to keep your
self-talk positive and confidence enhancing.
Editors Note: Dr. Patrick J. Cohn is an author,
professional speaker, and renowned mental game expert.
He works with athletes and teams in all sports. For more
information, contact Dr. Cohn at:
PatrickCohn@peaksports.com or visit
www.peaksports.com.